The Bonbon Curse
by AirgeadAgusFionn
Summary: When Lance finds a packet of Earth candies in a space shop he decides to have a little fun with them. Telling the Alteans tiny lies about blue tongues for amusement wasn't that bad, right?


**A/N ~ I've had this idea for a while now and I shared it with thesarcasticghost while I was eating bonbons and she helped me flesh the idea out. (And I may have stolen the title from our chat without her knowing)**

 **; )**

 **Also, I had to replace 'sweets' with 'candy' throughout this entire thing (god dammit America) so don't blame me if I missed any? Plus, do bonbons even exist outside Ireland? If not, they're this small round powdered sweet that turns your tongue blue. Just to be sure.**

 **~ Yes, I know our resident Green Paladin isn't in this fic but that was on purpose so in the story (?) to follow she will be confused as why Allura suddenly trusts her or when she suddenly doesn't.**

* * *

Shiro was being weird again. It was getting to a point where Lance just wanted to argue back with the same level of volume, but he knew that if he had done all hell would have broken loose. Just the memory of Shiro yelling at him for wasting his money at a space mall on a random packet of sugary goods was preventing him from enjoying them.

Which was a pity because they were blue bonbons.

Lance had always loved bonbons when he was a kid, loving how his tongue turned blue after he ate them. It was a small thrill that still hit him even in the dark reaches of space. The packet had instantly caught his eye, a bright blue amongst the planet's usual grey and brown packaged meals that were on the shelves. As soon as he had found out they resembled Earth's blue candies he had to buy them.

Pity Shiro hadn't seen them in the same light.

Lance sat on his bed, looking at the bright blue packet that sat as a weight in his hand, the soft crinkling sounds acted as a comfort each time the packet shifted. The whole thing was so much like Earth's candies, and it was a pity the Alteans didn't know much about Earth. They probably still thought humans were a mystery.

For all they knew Lance's tongue turned blue earlier because he had lied or something.

A thought edged its way into Lance's mind before he could stop it. It was terrible, sneaky and would probably get him into a lot of trouble. No, it would definetly get him into trouble. So much trouble Lance wondered if it was worth it, but his (stubborn) righteousness stomped on the question as fast as it could pop into his head in the first place.

The seed of his plan had already been sown. There was no going back. Lance grinned to himself and stood up, making his way for Shiro's room. Pidge was going to love this idea if (when) she was going to find out.

Shiro raised an eyebrow at him. "So…you're here because you want to apologise?"

Lance sighed, wondering how the heck Shiro was buying this, "Yeah. And give a peace offering. Buying the candy was stupid, and I shouldn't have wasted my gekk on something as useless as it. I really wanted to buy them for you because you seemed a bit taught these past few days and I thought you'd need to relax."

Shiro looked a bit put off by his answer. Considering that he was in his pyjamas and it was probably around midnight, Lance would say he'd be put off aswell. Well, no going back.

"Uh…thanks Lance," Shiro gingerly took the packet of candy away from him as if he wasn't sure what to do with it. "I mean, buying the things in the first place was a little…" he paused, as if he was struggling to find the right word, "childish," Lance flinched slightly at the word choice, but Shiro continued, "but thank you."

"Thank you, Shiro." Lance grinned, not entirely from the acceptance of his 'apology', "I'm going to go back to my room now."

Shiro nodded, and closed over his door. Without saying goodbye.

Rude.

At least the first part of his plan was complete. Now for phase two.

Lance was eating his breakfast which consisted of a hefty dose of the ever so consistent food goo when Allura walked in. She looked tired, but obviously putting the face masks Lance gave her to good use. Her skin looked flawless.

Aw yeah. Lance's face masks were the best, no matter what Pidge said.

She was just mad that he hadn't let her use any.

Allura must have noticed his smug grin if the confused look on her face was anything to go by. Lance shrugged at her and continued eating, shovelling the green goo into his mouth with the grace of a five year old. Eventually Allura took a seat beside him in Keith's spot with her own plate of food goo. Food goo was great and all, but he was getting tired of eating strictly green gloop from an ancient planet and nothing else all the time. Part of the reason he had bought the bonbons when he did.

Wait, the goo was in the castle when Allura and Coran had first been thawed from the healing pods... wait. Was the food goo they were all eating over 10,000 years old?! That could definetly explain the strange and grating taste.

Lance poked at his plate with the spork. It didn't look old, but then again it didn't look like food. More like the strange kind of grime that would grow in a bathroom.

Ugh, now his appetite was completely gone.

Lance pushed his plate away from him and ignored Allura's confused glance at him. Now he secretly wished that he kept the bonbons. At least then he'd have something normal to eat.

Speaking of bonbons, it was time for phase two.

"Hey Allura? Did you know that when Earthlings lie their tongue turns blue?"

Lance looked up at her only to see her now staring at him with a confound look spread across her face, her eyebrows pulled together. "What?"

Lance had to stop the grin from spreading across his face, forcing himself to stay neutral, "Oh yeah, guess you have alot to learn about humans after all. I swear I'm not lying, see my tongue?" He stuck his tongue out and gestured to it, "Still pink."

Allura darted her eyes between his tongue and eyes, brows creased together. "I've never seen any of you with a blue tongue."

It took everything Lance had not to cringe, but his mind quickly wound together something to fill the gap. "That's because we'd tend to keep our mouths closed after. The blue wears away after a few minutes and usually people don't want to he caught lying."

Allura nodded, eyebrows still drawn together and a finger rested on her chin. Lance just hoped she bought it.

He stood up and brought his plate over to the slot in the wall that acted as a dishwasher, ignoring Allura's obvious curiosity and confusion. "You should ask Shiro something. See if he's hiding anything and test it out," he added the last part with an obvious look in her direction.

Allura shot her eyes back down to her food goo, eyes glassing over as though thoughts were racing through her head. Lance shrugged and only hoped that Shiro had popped a few bonbons into his mouth before Allura would speak to him.

Now he had to play the waiting game.

Lance rolled back onto his heels as he idly glanced towards the door. Shiro would usually be through the door in less than a few ticks.

Sure as rain, Shiro sauntered through the door, Keith and Hunk in tow. Keith seemed relaxed and was talking with Hunk about something or other, and Lance felt a twinge of jealousy at how Hunk always managed to be one of the people Keith could unwind around.

He shook his head at himself. Keith probably didn't feel like that about Hunk…did he?

He had to focus though. Shiro had a smile on his face, the gesture looked off put though. "Good morning."

Lance raised an eyebrow at him. He had a blue tongue, obviously just after popping a bonbon into his mouth. A smirk spread across his face as he glanced over at Allura who was standing up out of Keith's seat.

She walked up to Shiro, and Lance noticed the confused look on his face as Allura stood in front of him, arms crossed.

"Do you like anybody on the team?" Allura narrowed her eyes at him and leaned foward slightly.

Shiro started sputtering and Lance felt his eyes widening. Not that kind of question! Oh god, this was going to go badly. He saw Keith and Hunk pause and look over at the two that were facing off. After years of knowing Hunk, Lance knew that he didn't like arguments.

"No?!" Shiro very nearly yelled.

Allura smirked, glancing down at his mouth, "Do you have a secret crush on me?"

Shiro's entire face lit up a bright shade of red that could challenge Keith's suit. "No? Where is this coming from?"

Allura smiled and leaned back, clasping her hands together happily. "That's amazing!"

A flash of hurt and disappointment appeared on Shiro's face, but it was gone before Lance could register that. This…was going in a different direction than he had thought it would.

"I like you too!" Allura jumped slightly with exitement, and Lance furrowed his eyebrows. He had thought that just happened in terrible movies with air-head blondes that were painted with false stereotypes. Still, he couldn't dwell on it as Hunk spoke up over Shiro's dumbfounded expression.

"Okay, what is going on?"

Allura turned to the yellow paladin with a smile on her face. "Human lies are wound with blue tongues." Okay, that didn't really help Hunk, but it did help the confusion growing in the room.

"What?" Shiro asked, the task of getting his food goo went completely forgotten. Keith seemed interested too, if the way he was literally sitting at the edge of his seat was anything to go by. Lance had to force himself to tear his eyes away from Keith's ass with a tang of remorse. It was a good ass, and those tight jeans didn't help Lance's case much.

"What now?" Hunk asked, cocking his head sideways which reminded Lance a bit of a dog.

Lance gave him a short glare, "Y'know, how our tongues turn blue when we lie." He raised an eyebrow to get his point across. Luckily, Hunk was used to his antics so his eyes widened for a second as he finally caught on.

"Oh, yeah our tongues..."

Shiro started sputtering. "No they don't!? Since when do our tongues turn blue, they've never done that!"

Lance flinched a little, but Allura clicked her tongue. "Don't lie Shiro, your tongue is still blue."

Shiro blushed harder than he had before, clearly at a dead end. He send a small, helpless glare towards Lance. All Lance could do was shrug because honestly? He had it coming. Besides, a little prank never hurt anybody.

Keith sent a cocky look in his direction, and christ that did not help Lance in any way. What was he planning?

"Hey, Lance?"

Lance hesitated at the tone. "Yeah?"

"You like Allura?"

Allura looked over at him. Shit, now he had to say something. "Uh, I do?" he flinched, "do… not." Allura furrowed her eyebrows, clearly seeing that he was 'telling the truth.' Fuck Keith. Honestly, Lance used to like her, who wouldn't? She was the stunning princess who had curly white hair like bright clouds on a sunny day, and eyes that could knock you dead with just a glance. And a personality to match her looks, bright but could kill if you so much as looked at her wrong.

Sure, he used to have a major crush on the princess, but now a certain angry and emo paladin was catching his eye more than he'd like to admit. An emo paladin with grey eyes that seemed almost purple in the sunlight, and hair like a raven's. Sure, the mullet wasn't helping his case… but he secretly liked it. Sort of.

"I mean, I used to…but now I dunno. You're more of… friend material," he finished lamely with a short shrug.

Keith gave him a measuring look, eyes going slightly soft at the edges.

Allura seemed content with his answer though, so she turned to Shiro and gave a flirty wink that turned out more like a drunken blink. Still, Lance could tell Shiro had thought it was adorable because well, he had eyes, right? Even Lance thought the obvious but terrible first try at Earth flirting was adorable.

When Lance looked back to Keith's seat, the red paladin looked deep in thought.

Well he was either in thought or planning on murdering his food goo. Honestly Lance would pay to see him try to murder Coran's cuisine. And the look on Coran's face afterwards would be priceless.

Was it even Coran's cooking? Or was it some Altean cook's who had lived back 10,000 years.

Damn, he needed to figure out the food goo age mystery. Stat. 


End file.
